"I feel like killing Locke for his careless wording and thinking. He's lucky he's already dead."

"If I'm getting demon posessed I'm demanding a full refund on my mail order voodoo priest certificate. Because what has that really gotten me except all the chicken I can eat, and the glare of doom?"

"Yeah, I looked fine in graduate school, let's face it."

"Just to throw sensitivity out the window for a second - voodoo? What a STUPID religion!"

"Looks like I left Rousseau out of the syllabus. I wonder why I did that...probably because I hate him."

"Don't fret those 100 lashes - this is the best of all possible worlds!"

"Apparently I've gone dyslexic."

"Oh no! I can't trust this GUI, I can't use this GUI, I can't LOVE this GUI!!"

"Skeptics still raise chinchillas, but they may raise fewer chinchillas than the rest of us."

"...which is why [Kant] is super cool, and will probably make you insane."